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Blonde Ails

9 Apr

Come for the corny titles. Stay for the shitty analysis. 

Who needs Little Yella Pils? Um, Betty Draper Francis. Clearly. I mean, holy hell, Bets. I turn around for 17 months, and you’re pushin’ 2 bills and your husband to drink. Hypothyroidism. Riggggghhtt. I know a Blue Bell diet when I see one. And Betty Draper is on the Pint-a-Day.

Hey, speaking of pints… Mama’s Little Yella Pils is an easy-drinking Czech Pilsener (get it) from the guys that brought you Ten Fidy, Old Chub, Dale’s, and all the other tastily metallic brews that come in those budget-breaking cans. Look, I like Oskar Blues as much as the next guy (provided he’s HopLover82), but at $10.75 for a sixer, I’m expecting a little more than Budweiser with pretty artwork.

Oskar Blues - Mama's Little Yella Pils

LYP is bready, slightly lemony and drinkable by the gallon at 5.3% ABV. It pours a translucent yellow, which wafts of citrusy ethers and sprouts a healthy two-finger white head — just like The King. You would like it, if you don’t have a penis.

Whoa, the P-bomb comes out early. Apologies. This is what happens when you drink Old Rasputin while blogging. Or as I call it, “field research.”

Let me tell you about a beer that I do like. Abita Strawberry LagerTrois Pistoles is a beer you can bring home to your mom — strong, dark, and French (note 1: Trois Pistoles is brewed in Quebec by Unibroue; note 2: my mother likes black men; note 3: I have a girlfriend). I had it last night in a bucket-sized Hoegaarden glass that Ms. Bartender Come Lately sought fit to serve my 12 oz. Belgian in. Hey, it was five bucks. I can live with the ill-fitting frat-ware.

A strong (9.0% ABV), dark (coffee-colored) Belgian ale with a dissipating head and malts galore, this one tastes like Blue Moon on a power trip. The knock-you-on-your-ass raisin/coriander/booze profile is a slog to drink, but the complexity makes for rewarding sipping and even better debate. Some people love this beer. I just used the plebeian Blue Moon as reference point… Its reputation exceeds it, no doubt, but it’s certainly worth a try. A beer for girls? Yeeeeeeee…. No. Unless you’re Betty Francis, who will put down anything.

Trois Pistoles

So, recap. Mama’s Little Yella Pils is Bud for snobs — a lightweight pilsener that you might’ve had from a warm keg once at a Tri-Delt mixer. Boringly refreshing. Trois Pistoles is a dark fruit-laced conversation piece that you might like, but you will definitely respect. It’s big and full-bodied, like — wait for it — Betty Draper Francis.


Orange Blossom Pilsner – Good Summer Beer But Not Craft Quality(and doesn’t claim to be)

19 Feb

Although, originally I perceived this beer as a craft since I have seen it on draft at places that carry only craft beers and have seen it in a craft festival…I have been mistaken and have had to edit this post.

Thanks owner Tom Moench for the correction and I won’t take into account that you called me a beer nazi.

OBP won the People’s Choice Award at the Tallahassee Beer Festival when I went in 2009. OBP is an okay beer. It is light, crispy and refreshing, it is just nothing special.   I was certainly not jumping up and down signing my “new favorite beer” song or anything.

**Correction. Compared to your typical domestic lager, OBP leaves Bud Light, Miller Light and most other domestic lagers in the dust. Most other beers reviewed on this site cover crafts, which are generally stronger and more full-bodied and much different from OBP.

FYI! Craft beer, refers to a small individually owned beer company, typically producing less than 15,000 barrels, that legitimizes themselves on the quality of their beer and not the marketing/mass quantity sales we see in many companies. Crafts or “microbrews” typically have quality beers that don’t waver in taste for the popular demand. Great craft brew companies include: Oskar Blues, Rogue, Sweetwater, Abita, Cigar City, Lagunitas and Stone.


OBP is a golden-honey color. It is clear has a thin layer of thin foam. The bottle is appealing with a bumblebee buzzing around and a claim to infuse this beer with Florida’s own orange blossom honey.


The first sips of OBP are crisp, refreshing and make you want to go lay out on the beach somewhere. There is a slight orange honey flavor but it is definitely not overwhelming. It’s citrusy but not overly sweet.

It is certainly not void of the classic beer taste you get with Bud or Miller. It is very Blue Moon like, except it is not cloudy and a little less bold. I got distracted at some point and came back to this beer five or 10 minutes later and the beer already seemed to be kind of stale and not 100 percent pleasant. I guess I will conclude that this beer is pretty good if you drink it when it’s really cold. But if you are sipping it and it gets warm you might not be happy with it.


This beer is classified as a Pilsner, a form of light Lagers that are generally hoppy, citrus-like and rich. It is uncharacteristic of Pilsner because it is not very hoppy and certainly not rich, however it is quite citrusy. At 5.5 percent alcohol, OBP is a little higher than your average brew, but not strong enough to worry about.

Final Thoughts

This beer is a better alternative to your average domestic lager, but I would not characterize it as a craft or microbrew. Since it is light and refreshing, drink it in the sun when it’s really cold and don’t let it get warm. Another light refreshing beer that I consider to be a better beer is, Magic Hat #9. Also, this beer is brewed in South Carolina despite its claim to be “Florida’s Honey Beer”, however they will be opening in Orlando this year.

Thanks Tom for the commentary. It’s good to see an owner who cares to defend his home brew.

Mama’s Little Yella Pils

1 Feb

Although I normally associate canned beer with Nascar, mud wrestling, above ground pools and monster trucks, I have made an exception with this beer and for good reason.

Mama’s Little Yella Pils is an oxymoron in a can.  It is a good craft beer in a can, which you rarely ever see.

Oskar Blues Brewery, based out of Colorado, holds a philosophy that cans are better. According the Oskar Blues website, founder Dale Katechis started putting his nice beers in cans because he thought it was “hilarious” and good for outdoor activities. He then later kept the idea after he discovered the benefits of cans.

Ever wondered why most beer bottles are the dark copper color? To keep out the light. Beer will skunk if exposed to light during the fermentation process. To “skunk” means to become foul smelling and tasting. And since metal is impenetrable by light, the Oskar Blues beers run no risk of this. Cans are also portable and durable if you are taking them outdoors. I have seen a group of snowboarders icing an Oskar Blues beer in the snow during a break from the slopes in Steamboat Spring, Colorado a few years ago.

In addition to this, cans can be more efficiently transported (which uses less fuel) and are more likely to be recycled.

This beer is a traditional Pilsner and has won multiple awards including Top 10 US Pilsners by the New York Times.

At 5.3 percent alcohol this beer is light and refreshing with a citrus tang. It foams up nicely and has a consistent flow of carbonation and a light layer of foam throughout the whole time you are drinking it, never falling prey to flat beer syndrome.

This beer is made with 100 percent pale malt and is sweet, enjoyable and ever so slightly bitter. It is very cloudy and a pretty golden color. One problem I had with this beer is the smell. It is quite musty and not sweet, floral or appealing at all. Other than that, this is a good beer. Although I can’t say I normally am too keen on pilsners in general, I enjoyed this beer.

Still holding carbonation and foam toward the end of the beer = good

It’s not overly heavy – definitely a good girl beer. It is also not overpowered by fruit either.

Don’t judge a book by its cover, and in this case, don’t judge a beer by its can.

Abita’s SOS (Save Our Shores) Beer – A Charitable Pilsner

26 Jan

SOS Beer If you have ever wanted to feel good about yourself while drinking beer,   this may be your prime opportunity. Abita’s SOS – A Charitable Pilsner is  part of a program created by Abita (Louisiana’s most recognized beer  producer) and the Louisiana Seafood Promotion & Marketing Board. 75  cents of each bottle sold and 100 percent off merchandise will go to the  SOS fund, which aims to restore Louisiana’s environment and industry  that was destroyed as a result of the BP oil spill.

This unfiltered Weizen Pilsner is  an orange-amber color and gives off  a very slight floral aroma (typical of many Pilsners.) “Weizen” means  wheat beer, which are typically made with malted barley. “Pilsner” means  a pale lager that is generally hoppy, or bitter, in taste as opposed to your  classic pale lagers such Bud Light and Miller Light. SOS is hopped with  German and Stereling Perle hops. Filtering refers to a process the removes  excess ingredients such as tiny pieces of barley that make the beer cloudy  in appearance and may result in sediment at the bottom of the beer. Since  this beer is NOT filtered it is cloudy, such as Blue Moon would be, but lacks sediments. Unfiltered beers are thought to be more nutritious and maintain natural carbonation.

This beer has a slight bite to it upon first sip. It is light and slightly hoppy, leaving no aftertaste. There is a slight fruit taste but not so much that the fruit is identifiable. After the first few sips, after one becomes accustomed to the hops, it is enjoyable. For some reason the carbonation and foam seemed to be perfect, even after sitting out for a little while. It is a true cross between a wheat beer and pilsner, having all the following qualities: slightly bitter, slight floral smell, golden color and light. I would not describe this beer as full-bodied but it is not thin either. It is rich, but not overwhelming.

SOS is 7 percent alcohol (your typical Bud Light is 4.2) and only comes in 22-ounce bottle. It ranges in price from $4 to $5 and can be found at most liquor stores or world markets. Because of the large bottle and high alcohol content, drinking one bottle would be equivalent to drinking about 4 Bud Light bottles, so be aware of this.

For the price, this is a good beer. It’s mild and would be a good starting place for girls that want to try a new beer without running of risk of getting a beer they hate. Don’t judge by first sip, the hops can be striking at first. Maybe consider splitting with someone else. Overall, SOS is a pleasant beer worth a try AND it comes in a really cool bottle.